Sunday, March 11, 2007

Epic fail

I thought I had one up on the ladies in the Argyle Vestalong: I didn't use Knitpicks Merino Style to make Eunny's Argyle Vest. I mean, the archives told me that this would mess up the row gauge, making it too big! So a solution was obvious: use Knitpicks Telemark, a lighter-weight wool. It seemed flawless! Swatching told me to up the needle size a bit, but this is no big deal.

To further complicate things, I had gotten this great hot pink yarn at the Michigan Fiber Fest which was about the same weight as my telemark. And how could I resist the temptation of a black and hot pink version of Eunny's vest? It would be so sexy! So complex! So... me!

But alas. No amount of swatching could prepare me for a problem I assume is caused by my hot pink yarn being somewhat lighter than my telemark. I thought my mad 1337 skills as a knitter could overcome this obstacle. But:

Yeah. The fair aisle isn't very fair; in fact, the tension is impossible to keep even. I can do fair aisle well; this I know, because I have a lovely pair of socks in my pile of UFOs. However, I've always tried it with two or more colors of the same. Never have I before tried fair-aisling different types of yarn. I didn't imagine it would be so bad.

Even though the color combination is fantastic, the unevenness does not do justice to Eunny's design... the other colors of telemark just don't have the same sort of "pop" to them as this pink does. NOTHING can live up to this pink, because it is my absolute, hands-down, favorite shade of my favorite color of all. Knitpicks, if you can hear me, make this color!

Indeed, this project has become an epic failure on top of an already crumbling life. Since taking the LSAT in September, everything has tumbled down...

You see, the day of the LSAT, I got my first-ever parking ticket. There were a million other cars parked where I was, but I paid it up anyway. Little did I know that was a sign of things to come. I was testing in the mid 160s; fine scores indeed! However, Kaplan has rated the test I took to be the hardest ever administered; and my scores that came six weeks later certainly reflect that. Every study buddy I had, every person I know who took it that day scored about ten points under what they were testing. Some gave up.

Me, I cried, and submitted applications to schools that I hadn't considered before. You see, I would have had a shot at great schools if I'd have gotten that 165-or-so. However, I now had a shot at good schools, or so I thought. In December, I submitted my applications and waited.

I graduated college. My thesis sucked.

I still waited and then some more until February.

I got into my third (last) choice school, which any literate and moderately motivated individual can get into. The thing is, they figure most people will flunk out and only the best will graduate (true).

I waited some more.

Even with a good scholarship, I calculated that if I pay the minimum on my student loans each month, I'll be paying them for 28 years.

Last week my top school, which had initially been my bottom school (back when I thought I had a shot) rejected me. When I told a colleague, she said, "Who the hell gets rejected from WSU Law?" I said, "Apparently me." How tactful. This spun me into a fit of depression that I haven't been able to shake since.

My second choice school is out there. It's not well-known for its law program. It's more well known for the hijinks of its fraternities full of overactive undergrads. But, it is a law school. I've only wanted to be a lawyer since I was twelve. Call it a childhood pipe dream, but all the choices I made were made with this goal in mind. It has crumbled before my eyes, and I'm left to disappoint all of those who believed in me. If fate is trying so hard to tell me not to do it, what the hell am I supposed to do instead? I have never even stopped to consider other possibilities save for the pipe dream of becoming a sales rep for Lorna's Laces...

So tell me, fellow knitters... Do I frog the vest?


Rose Red said...

From a recent completed FO frogger (it was meant to be a singlet top but ended up a potato sack) I say frog it. Your lovely pink is destined for another project. Re the law thing - not sure if this helps but as a failed lawyer, being a lawyer is not all it's cracked up to be. But don't give up, you'll find a way.

Alice said...

I'd frog it, otherwise it'll always be not quite right and associated with feeling crap and you won't wear it as much as the lovely pink deserves... but I frog everything.

Good luck at the school you got into. Maybe you can be the big fish there!